Austerity

 

dark is the sky that shreds through the sun
dark is the rails of vanity
that bleed through the lids
dark is the piercing eyes of the moon
that waxes and wanes in the night
that could see through the shadows and the soul

dark is the light that guides the narrow path
where the wick of a candle lies aghast
for prayers and hope are the pillars of strength
and light the darkest of times

–spaceandcaverns–

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PERSPECTIVE

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I was doing laundry in a laundromat a couple of years back and I came across and notice this sign on the wall. It was an art wall pretty much….it was more like a pun on how to do laundry properly. But once it settled, it has a correlation on how life unfolds as well….how we wash, dry, fold, and repeat…the same as how we are born, crawl, walk, run, then die and the cycle repeats itself once again.

Life is always constant and consistent with change. Sometimes it is hard to keep up with it for it doesn’t wait for anyone nor keep track of any stats or records—for stats and records are only spoken in memory. With change being so fast paced–we tend to run in auto-pilot, just breezing through.


  —-Change is the law of life. And those who look only in the past and in the present are certain to miss the future—– John F. Kennedy.


So, how are we able to cope with all the changes in our lives without feeling the pressure?….without feeling lethargic? without the feeling of lost? or having wishful thinking? that everything will just stay the same. How are we able to accept change or to change for that matter? without looking only in the past and in the present and not loose sight of the future?

Change for me came in the form of a loss–a loss of a father. I wasn’t lethargic, lost, heck, I wasn’t even wishfully thinking. Everything to me was the same; a loss that is some how unexpected and emphatically shocking—the agent?– cancer.  A very unexpected event indeed, that it shaped the course of my life. It has been two years that passed, that  life has changed and I am still struggling with the change—but in hindsight—wash, dry, fold, and repeat–life must go on.

Easy, right?

As human nature, we tend to bottle up or put on a brave face in order to look strong and show that we are not affected–plowing to the process of grief, but it is not a healthy process to do and yes, it is not easy.

Bringing perspective to my grief was and still is a challenge. There is the battle with grief that just sprouts during the day and it’s crippling; and there is this euphoria that grief had come and pass.

The perspective to my grief came through, when I was telling myself ” I WANT TO LIVE”–I want to live life to the fullest. I want to take stock of what I have and count my blessings. I want to explore and expound my potential–It is not worth destroying life because of a big change and setbacks.

I don’t want to be looking behind the past too much or too much in the present or way to ahead in the future, I want to enjoy life every second of it.  I want to share what I have and learn as much as I can in this life.

I slowly learn to accept the change–as fast paced as it is and to let go of grief, pain, and anger and to be mindful of life once again.


“Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed that is.  Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose.”– Master Yoda


What questions would you ask yourself?  What lessons have you learned?

As we pave the way for the New Year, let this be the year  the change that he or she is looking for . It has been a year of ups and downs but with struggle comes growth and progress and I am looking forward to the new challenges and life ahead.  May the New Year bring peace, joy, and growth to everyone.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! Everybody!!!

Love

Love knows
Love trust
Love smite
Love forgives
everything in plain sight

Love heals
Love builds
Love roots
like the canopy of a tree that shelter’s you

–spaceandcaverns–

(Phantom pain)

thoughts to expound and exudate
the sanguinous emotion of pain
the incense burning to manipulate
only to be lost and to intubate

breathe hard and breathe in
let the saline kick in
for the millimetre of mercury is dropping 
and the world is ashen and grey

love me back and hold me dear
whisper words that I longed to hear
for hours are counted by the seconds
and the radiating sun will judge me 
 

–spaceandcaverns–

 

 

Eggshell

you cried your heart out
as you walked down the aisle
 you burn your tears to make them go away
the sand is coarse just like your mouth
promises that bleed through my skin
like pulling pins

save me from yourself
before it’s too late

the same chord progression
the same pick up line
the same shit but in a different pile
the sun sets on this rosy night
as the fall wind starts to blow
your shell begins to crack
slowly but surely as you go

–spaceandcaverns–

N(2)

i can’t buy you time..
i can’t buy you space..
i can’t buy the past.. the present.. and the future..
i can’t buy your standard..
i can’t buy the world for you to sit on.. or the tiny tower that you built..
i can’t buy a hallmark card for you..
i can’t buy meds to heal your pain..
i can’t break the walls you put up..
i can’t buy an oscar fish..
i can’t buy your pride..
i can’t buy your change..
i can’t buy who you are…
i can’t buy what you have…
i can’t impress you with what i have..
but with all the candles lining up and burning for you.. let me be the one that burns and shines bright in you.

–spaceandcaverns–

Finding peace

img_1096serene is the light that reflects the shadows beyond the yonder

for the search for peace, is what oneself beseech to behold.

for there are no greener pasture on the other side of the fence–as an old aphorism, but in order to progress and grow, we climb and cross over the fence and trudged along the pastures that it holds.

for it is in those trudges that we leave a mark in this world.

–spaceandcaverns–

RESIGNATION

To whom it may concern,

Hello! How are you? I am writing to you today to tender my resignation and effective immediately.
It’s been a blast the past year and a lot of life has and had happen…priceless moments to be exact. Words can’t even express the inner feeling of gratitude and peace that you have given me. It is a humbling experience to be in this school of life…..but you were there every step of the way—as my guiding light.

img_1371Thank you for the memories, laughter, sacrifices, and joy that you brought into this world….the wonderful smile that you left to each and everyone of us… family, friends, colleagues who became family, and close friends….and will never be forgotten.

It was indeed a wonderful journey….deeply engraved in my soul…but I guess every journey has its own end…much like the old adage of “life is a journey not a destination”….

But I guess the journey has now come to an end….but what I do believe…..it is only the beginning….of even more beautiful events and destinations.

As I bade farewell to you….I gave you much love and respect to everything you’ve done….one day we’ll meet again…in his time, we will have our coffee again…

Take care as always….

______________________________

–spaceandcaverns–